42 Howls: Desperately Seeking Thomas

[coyote_walking]

Has anyone seen or heard from Thomas?

He hasn't answered any of my calls or contacted me and I'm starting to get a little freaked out.




Where are you? What's going on? You've got me all panicked here. I even checked to see if your picture was with those who've gone home.

Come on. I even signed up to do that damned show because you said it would be fun to do together.

Call me, text me, stop by, something!

Comments

private

[prodigalvampire]

If I'm the self-centered pig you're painting me out to be, why do you put up with me?

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

Because 99% of the time you're really wonderful.

And I don't mean to be painting you that way. I've just been scared to death. And now I'm fighting with Shal and feeling homesick and just waiting for the other shoe to drop and I just wish you could tell me when you need space so I'm not scaring myself and Harry wondering what terrible things could have happened to you when you just disappear.

private

[prodigalvampire]

I never disappeared, I just didn't answer.

Please don't fight with Shalimar. She doesn't deserve it. She's...broken, Mercy.

I'm...sorry...for causing all this. Heh. Kirk's right. I do make everything about me. And...I am a serial rapist. Not anymore, but just being I don't do that anymore, does it change anything? What I could be? How I could slip at any moment if for one second, I lose control?

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

And the difference from my end would be...?

I'm trying not to. And I know. You both are.

It does change things. Intent matters, Thomas.

Re: private

[prodigalvampire]

I don't want to be broken....

...I just....yeah, it really does. I intentionally took those women, Mercy. I knew what I was doing. It make the voice quiet. I got peace, I didn't have to hear it telling me how weak I am, and how much it enjoyed the feedings the Skinwalker forces on me. I didn't have to listen to it rambling, craving, because it was sated.

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

I know you don't, love. And you're trying to heal.

And now you're intentionally choosing to never allow that to happen again. Because you understand now that it didn't bring you peace. Not for long and not for real.

Re: private

[prodigalvampire]

I don't want to hurt you.

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

I know, Thomas, I know.

Maybe... does it help any to know that I understand what I've gotten myself into? And that if I was at home and involved with one of the werewolves my situation wouldn't be that much different? One second of distraction, an extra pound of pressure in the wrong place at the wrong time and they'd kill me. And more of them consider themselves monsters than you know.

And to my mind, none of you are.

You're what I want. And believe me, my semi-immunity to vampire powers assures that any influence, any addictive qualities It has over me fades fast. And after this much time? It couldn't call me to itself or to you, not unless you were right with me or touching me. That means that it's you I want to be with.

Re: private

[prodigalvampire]

Really?

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

Really.

Re: private

[prodigalvampire]

Why....why didn't you tell me?

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

I tried, but I think you just thought it was an excuse or that I was fooling myself.

And you know... you know what I crave most. That time with you before it's there. Would that be the case if I was that addicted?

Re: private

[prodigalvampire]

Mercy........

..........I don't know what to do.

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

Why don't you let me help?

Re: private

[prodigalvampire]

[BRB crying a lot]

Re: private

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

Thomas? Hon? You're not alone.

I'm right here.

private;;voice

[prodigalvampire]

[his voice is small and choked with tears.]

Please....come over....[whispered]I don't wanna be alone anymore...

Re: private;;voice

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

I'll be right there.

Get me out a t-shirt and a pair of your boxers? I'm faster as a coyote.

Re: private;;voice

[prodigalvampire]

...okay...

Action?

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

It wasn't long before there was a loud scratching at his door and a sort of barking sound that he should recognize.

Action;

[prodigalvampire]

Thomas dragged himself to the door and opened it, stepping aside for her to trot in. His face was streaked with tears, but he made even that look attractive, somehow.

Action;

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

She nuzzled at him, wanting to give comfort to him before she turned to find the clothes he'd said he'd have for her.

Re: Action;

[prodigalvampire]

He sniffed and moved back to the sofa, where the tshirt and shorts were waiting,sitting down and pulling his knees to his chest.

Re: Action;

[coyote-walking.livejournal.com]

Mercy shifted and quickly pulled on the clothes. Then she slid onto the sofa next to him, wrapping her arms around him. "I'm here now. You're not alone."

Re: Action;

[prodigalvampire]

He turned into her, almost without thought, crying again. He didn't think of what she must think of him, or how weak he must seem. All he could think was how good it felt to have her arms around him, to hear her voice, to smell her.